Bedazzled

 

bedazzled

Its been ages and I still can’t get over it –
That urge – a mad rush – to be with you.
To evaporate and condense again on your skin,
Clinging onto your petals like the morning dew.

Smitten by the warmth and love of your smile,
My poor old heart burns in hellfire.
Chained by reminiscences of unfulfilled love,
Consumed and captured by a deep desire.

I realize I was just an empty cup being filled,
by the fountain of lust that from you had surged.
Craving for the dope that was your raw beauty,
I snort on your memories – helpless and purged.

Memories of your hair falling on my face,
Like a gilded cage – enslaving my mind.
And my kisses enmeshed in your golden curls,
As I let the helix of my passion unwind.

When your lips quivered – wet with wine,
Offering an obvious answer to my temptation…
Our tongues talked in a language without words –
all inhibitions getting lost in translation.

Seeped under your skin – I still wait there…
For you to feel that incurable itch again.
And scratch to find me hidden underneath,
Throbbing inescapably in the walls of your vein.

The trail that your fingers left across my body –
The sheer heat leaving me grazed and singed.
As our bodies became naked fulcrums every night,
Upon which the callisthenics of our romance hinged.

Till I felt the white warm flesh of your arms,
I never knew how fast blood could rush to my head.
And my hormones stood up in rapt attention,
Ready to march – to where that touch of yours led.

I remember being intoxicated by wafts of your smell –
A breath, a scent – too familiar to forget.
I inhaled it as if it was what kept me alive…
That heady amalgamation of perfume and sweat.

You made me conscious of my base physicality –
As you traced my imperfections with your fingertips.
Revelling in forbidden love, as we drank together,
the spoils of the darkness in slow quenching sips.

In the depths of desire, you taught me a lesson –
That nothing in this world was meant to remain single.
It was the oldest decree of mankind and all life itself –
That two contrasting bodies were destined to mingle.

Your innocence was ripped by my nails in your flesh –
My hands coiled like a noose around your soft neck.
Infusing me with poison through your malevolent lips,
you left the ship of my desires in an exquisite wreck.

My nights were punctuated by the melodic rhythm –
Of your heart thumping beneath angelic breasts.
As the mandolin that was your tanned body,
Played soulful songs all through on my requests.

Every morning, before you put on your gown…
An infatuated sun painted your shoulders in gold.
That arousing vision still lingers in my mind…
Your sculpted shadow standing – beautiful and bold.

When you walked out of the shower – wet and dripping,
Silver light reflecting off your bare luscious form…
I struggled to hold onto the mast of self-control,
My libidinous mind ravaged by a sensual storm.

Lacing your chaste curves with my amorousness,
I discovered an addiction that had no cure.
In this sordid play of flesh and fervour,
I unearthed a joy – so unblemished and pure.

And though I have moved on – and started afresh,
Shorn off the yearning I had in my prime.
I still remember you in moments of weakness –
As the girl who bedazzled me once upon a time…

****************************************

NISHANK MEHTA  |  11.07.2016

Beyond

Beyond

 

I remember the day we first met –
as vividly, as if it was only yesterday.
Only – it isn’t, like I am ruthlessly reminded
by every minute since you’ve gone away.

Gone away to that timeless, rootless place,
feared by those of us who remain earth-bound.
Leaving me alone – with my now useless senses,
in a world bereft of your touch, smell or sound.

My mind obediently brings up your memories…
Memories people tell me I have to unlearn.
But the addict within me instead snorts on them,
craving for more, never ceasing to yearn.

I often dream of a cataclysm –
an extinction of this world unfilled by you.
And the birth of another one with only us in it –
swooning in each other’s existence anew.

I search for your voice – or at least a whisper,
in the noise that this deafening silence makes.
To speak to me and tell me that it’s okay,
to drown my pain in these heartaches.

Like an ocean wave on the shoreline of my eyes,
A flood of tears rises and falls each day.
And through the prisms of those tears, I see
an otherwise colourful world turn grey.

They say I have become forgetful –
that I misplace things and forget names.
But I remember my entire world burning,
The day your body went up in flames.

I remember the shape its smoke made that day –
the shape of a hand waving a silent goodbye.
I remember not lifting my eyes off that smoke,
till it rose up and became one with the sky.

I remember the warmth of your touch,
melting the iciness of my frozen heart.
I shudder now in this unsympathetic cold,
that has set down again when it saw you depart.

I sometimes still feel that touch…
In the gentle breeze that first caresses my face.
Then tickles down my neck like you used to,
Over my chest like you let your fingers trace.

I remember our first dance together –
and my trembling hands holding your hips.
I remember sinking in your breathtaking beauty,
and resurfacing with a kiss on your lips.

Somewhere in my mind, we’re still dancing –
oblivious of fate’s audacity to interrupt.
Somewhere inside me, you continue to rumble –
as a volcano of emotions threatening to erupt.

I remember that you weighed just right enough,
So I could carry you over in my arms.
I remember resisting just weak enough,
to be happily bowled over by your charms.

I remember that you stood just tall enough,
for your curves to slot perfectly in my embrace.
I remember staring at you just long enough,
to map the purpose of my life on your face.

I remember your eyes telling me stories –
stories, that I spent my entire life reading.
Oblivious of the empty pages and an abrupt end,
to which those stories were deceivingly leading.

In the great mirror of your voluble eyes,
I saw myself fragmented and yet whole.
I loved how beautiful I looked inside them,
Camouflaged within the backdrop of your soul.

I remember our first quarrel – a one-sided affair,
You soon had me eating out of your hand.
At your irresistible best when you were sulking,
I merrily placed myself under your command.

I kept fighting and losing just to win your love –
And though you knew it, you readily took the bait.
I never knew I would be asked to make the cruelest flip,
Between losing to you and losing you to fate.

I remember the exact shade of pink you turned into,
When I knelt down and asked you to be my wife.
And how eternities passed in the four agonizing seconds,
Before you answered with the word that changed my life.

Moments with you that I had once taken for granted –
because I thought there were many more to come.
Moments that my miserly mind now keeps counting,
Wishing that if needed, it could conjure up some.

When I think of those delicately cherished moments,
I feel like I am alive and young again.
On the parched and barren lands of my heart,
Those moments fall soothingly as god-sent rain.

In the pause between the pace of my breaths,
I rage at the blasphemy of the air…
That flows in with each breath and pilfers a place,
That you once filled but is now left bare.

I don’t know which of us is more selfish –
You, for leaving me – abandoned and alone.
Or me, wanting to cage you again in my love,
Back from the serenity to which you have flown.

All I ask for is another kiss, another hug…
Another smile, another day – just one more!
Just another chance to hold your hand,
And accompany you, through the trap-door.

Lest I carry anything more than my emptiness,
I am stripped and searched wherever I go.
But that you still fill those empty spaces,
No one but me shall ever know.

I stare at the place you used to lay your head,
Now – just a wet pillow, watered by my tears.
I wish I could wrestle time and turn it around,
And relive every single one of those precious years.

Every night I fight sleep till it overpowers me,
Dragging me away from your thoughts.
Weary of the line that has now become my life,
I wait fervently for the final few dots.

I feel invincible in the shadow of your love,
Past breath, past death – it still endures.
Waiting patiently for His call to come, so
I can be once again – and this time, forever yours.

***********************

NISHANK MEHTA  |  03.06.2016

Hurricane Hearts

 

hearts2

When I found you, I discovered love,
and I felt its divine might unfold.
Trapped in a storm of your fragrance,
My most lofty dreams struck gold.

You stole my breath and blinded my eyes,
you rolled my heart in alleys of fantasy.
Our souls celebrated their glorious unison,
and our minds dawdled in wild ecstasy.

Suddenly, but surely, nature began to stage,
theatrical performances to salute our bond.
Stars began sketching and spelling out words,
as a glittery horizon stretched for ever beyond.

Those little lights that shone in your eyes
Those little curls that surfed in your hair
Those stolen moments in moonlit nights
Those intoxicating smells floating in the air.

It was like a sculpture chiseled to perfection…
It was like music orchestrated by divine hands.
It was like a silken fabric of intertwined desires,
It was like a nymph sleeping on golden sands.

Together we kindled up an eternal fire,
with a flame made from sworn love.
The ground beneath your feet for me,
was a dream-filled treasure trove.

Relationships are known to breed in time,
but untested love is as good as a sin.
Fate always lays our path with hurdles,
to ensure that we indeed deserve our win.

The piercing pain of separation stung,
as we succumbed to cruel twists of fate.
My wounded soul, engaged in a striptease,
begged to crush that wailing wall of hate.

My heart got drowned in an ocean of gloom,
and a chilling silence gripped my mind.
Hollow promises and empty condolences,
failed to resurrect what I had lost behind.

I picked up pieces of our shattered love,
and sealed them with adoration’s kiss.
My eyes then had a tiresome schedule,
as I sorely wept for what had gone amiss.

I loitered in streets of lost memories,
and waited for something to do the cure.
But, ah! the wounds were so deep and real,
and the cause of it so honest and pure.

The entire cosmos whirled in disarray,
with its axis piercing through my skin.
You left me with nothing much to lose,
and strangulated the very desire to win.

I bled out great woe in copious amounts,
and hoped for sunken love to shine again,
A prayer fluttered and took off to heaven,
as my scarred heart yearned for a pacific rain.

Sometimes we love with nothing more than hope,
Sometimes we cry with everything except tears.
A sincere affection has never ever lost a battle,
and whispers of my love fell on those ears.

She returned – and it was utopia in encore,
Light again danced where gloom had been.
The world again sprang up in great applause,
for the greatest love they had ever seen.

Reality became synonymous with dreams –
Resplendent days and celestial nights.
As our love re-emerged like a phoenix,
and perched itself on unreachable heights.

***************************

NISHANK MEHTA  |  14.04.2008